Four Ways To Fight Adultery Before You Are Married (Adultery - Part 3)
by Jason Berl on August 3rd, 2016
If you do not begin fighting infidelity until you have already begun an inappropriate relationship, you have started the fight too late. I would even argue that if you start to fight infidelity on your wedding day, you have started too late. There are healthy patterns you can establish before you say “I do” that can give you and your future spouse increased confidence that you will be faithful t...
Two Signs You Are About To Have An Affair (Adultery - Part 2)
by Jason Berl on August 2nd, 2016
Helping couples fight for their marriages through the excruciating pain of adultery has been one of the greatest privileges of my life. That being said, I would prefer for the affairs to never have happened. There are many signs that you are in danger of having an affair, but I've noticed two that are almost always present and reasonably easy to discern. Please know that I am sharing this to lovin...
Why A Blog Series About Adultery? (Adultery - Part 1)
by Jason Berl on August 1st, 2016
It is hard to get up-to-date and accurate statistics on adultery, because many affairs are probably not discovered or reported to questionnaires. However, many researchers suggest that adultery affects more than half of all marriages nationally. For this reason and more, I am writing a series of blogs about adultery. I plan to release one blog each day this week. “Well, definitive numbers are...
Three Questions To Ask Your Spouse
by Jason Berl on January 18th, 2016
Marriage, in many ways, is similar to gardening. You cannot plant a garden, neglect it, and expect to have a healthy garden a year later. To have a healthy garden, you will need to invest significant time pulling weeds, keeping out pests, planting, watering, and fertilizing. A few times a year, you will need to devote significant time (a weekend, day, or half-day) to working in the garden. Every...
5 Misconceptions of Forgiveness
by Jason Berl on September 4th, 2015
The word "forgiveness" is used frequently in church, movies, and song lyrics. However, meeting with individuals and couples in counseling has taught me that many struggle to understand forgiveness. When I hear that someone is struggling to forgive, I frequently ask, "Well, what is forgiveness? What is it that you are struggling to do?" Many respond, "You know, like, just forgive." Then comes the ...
I Am Weak: A Personal Reflection
by Jason Berl on July 26th, 2015
At times, we all feel out of control. I wrote the following as a personal prayer and meditation. I decided to share it with the hope that it encourages you. I frequently meet with people in counseling sessions who have strong desires and fears, and feel out of control and even powerless. I often ask them, "What do you do when you feel out of control?" This is simply me being honest about a few...
Inside Out: A Counselor's Critique
by Jason Berl on June 23rd, 2015
The children in the movie were laughing hysterically at the funny voices and humorous jokes. I was analyzing the psychology of the movie while also seeking to enjoy the date night with my wife. It is advertised as a children's movie, but I believe the producers were seeking to influence and teach the adults that brought the kids to the movie. As a counselor, I loved this movie! There were more t...
Sex, Fire, & Fathers: Potential for Great Good & Great Harm
by Jason Berl on June 21st, 2015
Those things in life that have the greatest power for good also are able to cause the most pain and suffering. Sex. Fire. Fathers. Those are just a few things that come to mind when thinking of things that can cause both great joy and terrible harm. Yes, mothers could be put in this category, but today is Father's Day. Sex can be a beautiful and powerful expression of love and can produce precious...
Money, Money, Money: Why Do Married Couples Argue About Money?
by Jason Berl on May 29th, 2015
Type "most common arguments in marriage" into Google and look at the research. Money is near the top of every "what couples argue about" list. Most of these lists include money, sex, children, in-laws, cleanliness, and a few others. Why is money so often a source of tension? If it is a source of tension in your marriage, what can you do about it? Money is frequently a source of tension, becau...
"I Love You"
by Jason Berl on May 8th, 2015
What does "I love you" mean? Some say it all the time, and others feel weird saying it at all. When you say "I love you," what do you mean? Your answer to that question matters greatly. When Jesus was asked what the most important commandant is, he responded, “you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second ...
Competition: Fuel on the Field, but Poison Among Peers
by Jason Berl on April 17th, 2015
Think about your best childhood friend. You likely have great memories with this person, and he or she has had a huge influence on your life. Consider the qualities that made this person your best friend. Was is that he was faster, stronger, and better than everyone else? Was it that she was the smartest or best looking? I doubt it. I bet you bonded over common interests, and you felt like you c...
Suffering On Easter
by Jason Berl on April 4th, 2015
As a Christian counselor, I often tell people that it is okay not to be okay. As I walk with those struggling with depression, difficulties in their marriage, loss, addictions, etc., I encourage them to let themselves be emotionally affected by their pain instead of denying the truth of how they are doing. I ask them to take off the "I am fine" mask and tell the truth. At the same time, I seek t...
Why A Blog Series About Adultery? (Adultery - Part 1)Two Signs You Are About To Have An Affair (Adultery - Part 2)Four Ways To Fight Adultery Before You Are Married (Adultery - Part 3)Four Steps To Recovering Your Marriage After An Affair (Adultery - Part 4)Is It Weak To Stay With Your Adulterous Spouse? (Adultery - Part 5)Six Ways to Help When Your Friend's Marriage Is Wrecked By Adultery (Adultery - Part 6)